I'm Not Sorry

I had lunch with my very wise sister the other day. She gave me some good advice: Don't be sorry. So I'm not, and I won't be. Or at least I'm going to try not to be.....

I'm not sorry for stepping on toes when I'm looking out for Elise.

I'm not sorry to decline invitations when my family just needs a night/day/meal/hour/weekend at home.

I'm not sorry if my enthusiasm blurs the focus or if my focus blurs the enthusiasm.

I'm not sorry for being honest, even though honesty, even very gentle honesty, is hard to hear.

I'm not sorry for saying no, saying yes, wanting good things, working too long, working a half day, paying too much, going the long way, taking time for myself, being sick, ignoring the clothes in the dryer, forgetting dinner, enjoying dessert, leaving the lights on....

There are way too many opportunities begging us to be sorry. Some of them count. Most of them don't.

17 months old

Am I crazy for keeping track of Elise's age in months? To me, 17 months is way older than 12 months, but it's definitely not 18 months. I know, maybe I'm a little nuts, but in my short experience, I haven't found another mom who isn't.

At 17 months, Elise can say a few works clearly, but most require a translator. She can sign please, thank you, more, all done, book, pipe, and sleep. I love the signing, and I think it helps her communicate what she wants a little easier. While I'm excited for her to talk, it's nice to know what she wants even though she can't actually say it.

Some of Elise's new favorites include: being pushed around the house in her cozy coup, walking around outside with daddy, walking anywhere instead of being carried, singing the ABC's and chiming in with "D" (the only letter she knows) at the right time, reading books, marching with mom through the house, riding on Sandy the horse at Meijer, "helping" mom with the laundry, playing rough (the rougher the better!), and flushing the toilet.

Here are a few pictures of the last couple weeks. I say it every few months, but this age just might be my favorite. We're having lots of fun!

I've been thinking.....

The last of the snow is almost gone. We've enjoyed sunshine nearly every day last week. Winter is definitely on the way out, and glorious spring is here. Spring!!

And I've been thinking, how is it that this is the 30th time in my life that winter has faded and spring returns, and yet I am surprised. I can hardly believe that I can safely put the boots and snow pants away. Did I truly believe that this was the year of never-ending winter? Is my memory so poor? Is spring just that exciting? Is winter just that long??

I think this is a reminder of how feeble our minds really are. It's a testament to how quickly I forget, even if it's the umpteenth time it's happened. I know that when I study the Israelites in the Old Testament, I can't believe how many times they turn their backs on God to worship idols and pagan gods. How many times does that happen in their history? And yet, the cycle of falling away and then coming back to God repeats itself dozens and dozens of times.

I'm not that different. God's telling me as spring returns and I recognize my very weak memory, that I am no different than those Israelites. How many times have I laid awake at night worrying about the future, even though every time God takes care of it, even the littlest most minor details of it. How many times have I decided that it was too much, only to be given more patience, more strength, more understanding at just the right time from my gracious God. He shows up every time. Just like spring. God has never failed me. And yet I forget.

Maybe I'll do better. Maybe I'll remember more often, or at least forget less. I hope that as Elise and I enjoy the sunshine this week, and as we welcome all the exciting sounds and smells of spring, we'll praise God for His complete faithfulness. We'll delight in a God who brings us spring every year.